From Edinburgh to Eternity: My Journey of Faith / Guest Post by Stuart Brown

We all have a story, and for many of us, it’s a winding road full of detours, struggles, and lessons learned the hard way. Some people seem to walk a straight path toward faith, while others, like me, take the long way around. My story began in Edinburgh, Scotland, but it has taken me across continents, through military service, family joys, personal failures, and seasons of loneliness and ultimately into the arms of Jesus Christ.

I was born in Edinburgh, Scotland, into a family that didn’t attend church very often. God wasn’t really part of our daily lives, and faith wasn’t something we talked much about. Like many teenagers, I grew restless under the authority of my parents. By the time I turned 18, I wanted independence more than anything. In 1979, I joined the Royal Air Force ( I REALLY DID NOT THINK THROUGH THE AUTHORITY THING BEFORE THAT  DECISION), eager to escape and prove that I could stand on my own.

The Air Force taught me a lot about discipline, responsibility, and hard work. But it also reinforced the world’s idea of what a man should be. In those years, I worked hard — but I also partied even harder. Success was measured by what you achieved, how tough you looked, and how much fun you could pack into the weekends. Deep down, I thought I was becoming the man I was meant to be. In reality, I was running from God and building my identity on things that wouldn’t last.

In 1991, just after the first Gulf War, I married for the first time. Not long after, I was blessed with two wonderful children who would always remain a source of joy and pride for me. Life seemed to be moving forward.

By 1996, I decided to leave the Air Force behind and move to the United States in search of a new beginning. I was ready for a fresh start, but I didn’t realize how much my life was about to change.

In November of 1997, just a year after arriving in America, someone knocked on my door and introduced me to Jesus. It’s amazing how God sometimes sends people at just the right time. That simple knock became the turning point of my entire life. For the first time, I began to truly see who Jesus was and what He had done for me.

Even with this new faith, the road wasn’t smooth. By 2000, my first marriage ended in divorce. Looking back, I can see how much pride and ego played a role in that outcome. I refused to seek counseling because, in my mind, “men don’t do that.” I thought admitting I needed help was a weakness. How wrong I was. That decision cost me dearly.

After the divorce, I spent 19 years living on my own. They were years filled with activity — but also with emptiness.

During those years, I threw myself into church life. I attended services three times a week, memorized scripture, and stayed busy in ministry. I drove buses to pick up kids for Sunday school, took youth to summer camps and ski trips, chaperoned soccer matches and volleyball games, taught Sunday school classes, ushered faithfully, and went soul-winning door to door several times a week.

On the surface, it looked like I was a strong, faithful Christian. To others, I probably seemed like someone fully devoted to God’s work. But inside, I was running on empty.
What I didn’t realize then was that I had slipped into a performance-based Christianity. I believed that the more I did, the more God would love me. My worth was tied to my service. If I missed a responsibility, I felt guilty. If I served well, I felt like maybe God would finally approve of me. But the truth was, no matter how much I did, I never felt the joy and peace that only comes from knowing God’s unconditional love.

In 2019, God wrote a new chapter in my story. I remarried a wonderful Christian woman who has been an incredible blessing in my life. Together, we found a new church home where people loved me for who I was, not for what I did.

That was a game-changer. For the first time in a long time, I began to experience grace through the love of others. Still, I wrestled with self-doubt. I often asked myself: Why would people or God love me? What do they see in me?

Slowly, God began peeling back the layers of lies I had believed for years. Through His Word, through the encouragement of my wife, and through the acceptance of my church family, I began to see the truth: God’s love is not conditional.

The greatest shift in my life has been realizing that Jesus already did it all. On the cross, He cried out, “It is finished.” That means the work is done. I don’t need to perform to earn God’s approval, because in Christ, I already have it.

Today, I’m learning to see myself the way God sees me:

• I am a new creation.
• I have a new heart and a new mind.
• I am born again.
• I am loved.
• I am completely forgiven.
• I have eternal life.
• I am clothed in Christ’s righteousness.

These aren’t just words on a page. They are promises from God’s Word. They are truths that I cling to when doubt creeps in, when old habits of performance whisper that I’m not enough, and when the enemy tries to remind me of my failures.

As Romans 8:1 declares: “There is therefore now no condemnation to them which are in Christ Jesus.”That verse has become an anchor for me. My past mistakes, my pride, my failures — they no longer define me. Christ defines me.

My journey is ongoing. I know I won’t change overnight. There are still days when I struggle with old ways of thinking. But I’m learning to walk in the truth of who I am in Him. I am not striving for God’s love anymore — I am resting in it.

And that has made all the difference.